Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Divorce (part 2)

People enter into marriage for a myriad of reasons. Some favorable to God while others...well, we can see with the many divorces that have come about in the last 20-30 years. Paul writes if you cannot contain yourself then marry for it is not a sin but you will have trouble (1 Corinthians 7:36 AMP). That verse all by itself should have given us all reason to stand up and take notice. Trouble? No one purposely tries to get into trouble. Why, why would Paul deem such a thing on men and women of God for generations to come? He also writes when you were single you concerned yourself about the things of God but married you concern yourself about worldly matters (1 Corinthians 7:32-34 AMP). How irritating is that? All of this time while trying to do what's right, the only time you were right is by being single? Now that you marry, you can't focus on the things of God anymore? Really. Is that what Paul meant?

For sometime, I disregarded the verse because Paul had never been married and was speculating. However, as I studied the Word, it kept popping back up. If one marries for the purposes of satisfying his loins, his mind wasn't on the things above but the things south of the border (below). If temperance or the flesh was never really controlled then it will again start to infiltrate other matters in one's life (1 Corinthians 7:37 AMP). If lust was the reason for the matrimony then lust will come again in other things like a business venture, purchasing a house, playing a card game, or even buying a pair of shoes. For instance, you see someone you know doing well. Normally, you would feel fine and congratulate him/her but instead there are these strange feeling that arise. Thoughts come over your mind:

You know they don't have the experience you have. They don't have the education you have. They don't have the connections you have so how could they afford a luxury car, and expensive vacation home or even take a vacation for that matter? Who do they think they are?

Where did those thoughts come from? Don't you see, this is the trouble that Paul was referring. These are the worldly matters he taught in the scriptures. And why? Because there was no discipline before getting married. You answered to lust. Lust simply is not being satisfied (Philippians 4:11 AMP).

No one really likes discipline but it has its place in child rearing both in the natural and in the spirit. A child without instruction or correction grows to be a fool. He is self confident and arrogant. The bible says he is a grief to his mother and in as much a disgrace to his father (Proverbs 10:1 AMP). God chastises those whom He loves and we should not despise it. For in the long scheme of things (usually after the pain) , the correction will be to our benefit.

Divorce occurs after the passion has been fulfilled. We then see what we should have seen if taken the time to date properly. Error is clear but instead of being mature to see a Marriage Counselor, the quick fix is divorce. In getting this quick fix, understand that there will be consequences. I don't know why people don't see that there is a consequence in getting a divorce.... unless discipline was never tended to. Nevertheless, without understanding, these things will be repeated:

1. Dating (courting) occurs for the two people to see what they have in common. Dating is for the purposes of marriage and not to see if the goods are suitable for the other. Divorce is realizing that the person you married was supposed to be for someone else.

2. In getting a divorce, at least one person has been hurt. Most of the time, there is no love in this process and therefore, the one initiating the legal documents doesn't realize or couldn't care less the hurt and pain that has been inflicted upon the other and the children. Know the Word tells us to touch not thine anointed and do His prophets no harm. It also says that it is better that a millstone be put around the neck of the one that offends the little ones.

3. Children aren't as resilient as the previous generations thought they would be. Children can grow up angry and resentful when they have been left with one parent that has to do it all. The Word tells us that a man that does not support his children is worse then an infidel.

Just like man made medication, divorce has side effects that can last longer than the relationship. These are 3 reasons why someone's life is in turmoil and he/she doesn't understand why. Make that confession and clean up. Don't repeat these same offenses again.

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