Women's Day (Part 2)

In rightly dividing the Word, we are supposed to be listening to what is being taught and then having the

desire to study for ourselves. Take out those notes, our bible and spend time to see if the Word was quoted correctly and if it was used in the proper context. With all of those things in order, then and only then could we use the message in applying it into our lives or to use in discussions or to help someone in their time of need. Anything else without these matters in place is a person in error and causing others to be as well. You will discover this as you continue to read.

In the first part of this post, hopefully the idea that a virtuous woman can only be if she is a house wife has been dispelled. Her priority is in Christ and then doing what He has called her to do. This is the message that I didn't hear and is why I write. The other passages under the guise of "Women's Day" also kept the real message from being expounded upon. I am not sure if the reasoning is trying to only teach what the people can be comfortable in hearing or if the ministers were directed not to

preach such things. I don't have those constraints.

The book of Esther is one of those popular sermons where it has been said, to the group of women I was seated with, that if a woman wishes to keep her husband she should do as Esther has done and not Queen Vashti. It was also reiterated of the respect Esther had for her Uncle Mordeccai and for her husband once she became Queen. She also was obedient which is why she was highly favored (though her looks added to some of the benefit). While I took in these lessons, it wasn't until much later in my own studies did I wonder if the female ministers read the entire book of Esther or just the passages that seemed pertinent for the message. I also wondered if these lessons were from the Lord or something seen on television or recorded and watched to be taught again and again. If so, that was not from the Lord's table. The Lord may have prepared a meal in the presence of our enemies, but rest assured the meal had not been eaten before and regurgitated for us to swallow (Psalms 23:5 AMP).

To understand Esther in the role that was thrust upon her, you must first see the king for who he actually was. He was a foolish man. He held parties that lasted far longer then necessary and the only one enjoying his parties was him (Esther 1:1-8 AMP). He would have the food and drinks placed for everyone but no one would be drinking but him. Then when he called for his wife, Vashti, she was tired having thrown her own party for the women and wasn't about to be humiliated as she has been putting up with the king's drunken behavior before (Esther 1:9-12 AMP). She refused him. The king could have pouted for a moment and been over it. But the princes had to be bored. They were the ones that started thinking that the queen had some influence and would cause for their wives to be just as impassive (Esther 1:16-20 AMP). That was fear doing the thinking for them. Seeing the king was not of a sober mind, he listened and acted on that thought of

fear. This is what caused for the queen to lose her position.

Now Esther, she was a child. Not knowing what happened to her actual parents gives some perspective as to why Esther's demeanor was the way it was. She had been obedient and without a doubt her Uncle, a godly man, prayed for her. We also don't know if her Uncle had anymore children of his own. Assuming that he didn't, because the Word never tells us that he went back to his home or to his wife and family, he kept a close watch on his niece. Never did I ever hear how close knit this family was and why Esther may have felt that way; however when her surroundings changed so did she.

Why do you think Esther went from a humbling, obedient, quiet child that was highly favored to one that was going to give her Uncle a directive? He told her what was needed to be done to save the people and that she was placed in the position for this very reason. Instead of her seeing the big picture, she looked at how she had been trained to do as the king ordered (Esther 4:8-11 AMP). The order was, not to disturb the king unless he called for you. Did you notice how Mordeccai got her head back together (Esther 4: 12-17 AMP)? He reminded her where she came from. She saw her position being greater then the niece of her Uncle. Actually, it was...only Esther was a child and didn't see that. She had a decision to make and this may have been the last time her Uncle could give her a directive to follow. After all, she is the queen and needed to be about serving her husband not her Uncle. But, again, this isn't the message that was taught in the services I attended or those I've seen.

Now this is the part that most female speakers get trapped in and deliver the oration as a show on how to be that domestic engineer that all men desire in a woman. What is ministered is that the woman needs to be able to read her man (know his ways). She should not come at him the moment he comes home, but she should allow him to relax, draw him a bath, serve him a hot meal. Then after he has finished and is in a better state of mind, ask what you will. Then the scripture is used in seeing what Esther did with the king just for him to reconsider what he had ordered (Esther 5 AMP). Yeah right! Did we not establish that Esther is a child? Did we not already establish that she had no clue as to what to do with any man much less her husband? And if you keep reading, she didn't ask him with the first dinner, or the second. What I wondered was, what happened afterward? I mean after the order was over and Haman was executed? Did Esther continue cooking her man's meals or did she have those servants do as they have been hired to do? And isn't that manipulative? Does a man appreciate a conniving woman? Is this seed sown and now her husband can be the same way? Is this the sort of thing a woman hopes the rest of her life must consist of in order to speak to her husband? Its ridiculous, isn't it? It sounds like a hard task to keep up with especially when a woman

never had to go through such foolishness as a single person living her life righteous before the Lord. Why would God make marriage hard for us? Answer: He wouldn't.

The real lesson in Esther for the purpose of Women's Day is the childishness of the king listening to the advice of princes. He got what he deserved. The equivalence of who he is. All of those parties and allowing for those who were not chosen to be king have control of the decision making, got him a wife that was equally yoked with his personality. She was a child easily to be controlled and manipulated. We saw this when Mordeccai told Esther what to do. He was no longer in that position to do that, but she adhered to his direction. The princes told the king what to do. They were not in a position to make that decree themselves and if the king knew his place, he would have put those princes in theirs.

When a woman accepts the proposal of a man, she must know that he has the confidence, assertiveness, and aggression to hold the position as being the head of her. He has some direction of where he would like to be and is appreciative of the help that she is able to give to get him there. If its all about him and he doesn't love her as Christ loves the church, and therefore should expect all sorts of trouble. Because this man will be asking advice of all sorts of matters that should be left to you, him, and God - only!

Hey, Those Are My Kids!!!!

Alright, so we have accepted Jesus as our Lord and Savior and have learned some things that we expect should be happening in our lives on a constant. A little skeptical at first, but He has proven Himself over and over again to be true. There were plenty of things we can say, that if it weren't for the Lord, the outcome of many circumstances would have been a lot worse then they were. Thank God for Jesus! Phew!!!

Now as much as you would not like to complain about your life (because you know better then to do that), you have these thoughts. No matter how much you rebuke them and try to think of more pleasant things, the entertainment of these thoughts, you can't help but to admit, how true some of them are. Stuff like:

It was so much easier when you didn't know as much as you do about Jesus.

You had more friends when you didn't know about salvation.

You use to be the "cool" parent.

What's a little drink with co-workers after work? It doesn't have to be alcohol.

You can dance to "old school" music. What's the harm in that? Yeesh!

So you venture forth reasoning that you should be able to be happy too. There can't be an issue doing any of those things. True, you haven't been doing them in a long time because you hadn't had a desire to do them since coming into the knowledge of the truth, but it wasn't an issue before. What's the big deal now? Besides, you were asked by a few of your friends and they haven't been around in awhile. Why not? Its just a little fun, and you deserve it.

That is the attitude I had and have heard while on this Christian journey. I have seen some hard times and have wailed before the Lord, "What have I done to deserve this punishment? Tell me, so I can turn this thing around!" I went before ministers for help and they had no clue. I went to different ministries and expected to hear a more clear message just for me because I was visiting. It didn't happen. I forged through those times of which I remember and wince at the aggravation, frustration, and even questioning if I really received salvation. Because nothing changed and it didn't seem my question was being answered, I stayed to myself and continued to pray and study the Word. 

Did you think I was going to write that I gave up and went back out in the world? Ha! I know better. There is nothing for me out there no matter what turmoil I was going through at the time. I knew enough to know that God gives us tests for us to use the new material we have learned attending services regularly. There is a reason in bringing that notebook and taking notes. I went through the messages for the last few months. I had nothing in my notebook to keep me encouraged with all of the crap I was going through. Sure, I could keep saying the same verses that the ministers gave me over and over again but would that give me a clear understanding what this was? I kid you not, one minister I saw in the hall of the church on a weekday, stopped me. I thought he had heard from the Lord and was going to give me the answer I had been looking for. At first, he thought I needed to hear compliments. This was only irritating me. Then he said a scripture that I didn't hear from the other ministers. I suppose he saw the look of relief on my face and then quoted a few more verses. No, not the actual scripture like the Lord said, this or that. He was stating a specific book of the bible and the numbered verse where the scripture would found. He had a monster list of verses. He asked me if I had a paper and pen and continued on. I wish I had not seen him while going out of the door. When I tried to leave he said, "I'm not finished." He sat at the edge of the window (nowhere near the door I was trying to get out of) and got himself comfortable. He sighed, looked up at the ceiling and rattled off verse after verse for me to list on the back of my notebook.  At the time, I didn't see God's sense of humor. 

When I  got to my car, I wondered what that minister thought I was going to do with that list. I went home and began looking up some of the verses hoping that I would get some relief in what I found. He just rattled off verses. None of them had anything to do with what I was going through. I then thought about the scripture in Proverbs where it says there is safety in a multitude of counselors. Did I need to see more? So I did. It didn't get any better. What to do? What to do? I prayed....fervently....habitually.....with expectation.

Oddly enough, it took years before I got an answer. Why oddly? Because God doesn't work like that. So

why was it years rather then hours or a few days? Because its not Him - its us. We say, think, and do a myriad of things that we believe is normal. We have been trained in it for so long, we don't see the harm. But there is. I have written this message before in much detail. The reason I am writing this again is for the simple fact, its been years and you might be going through something that some minister gave an arbitrary, pedantic excuse for it. Do you know I had a female minister tell me that God is busy right now but He will get to me as soon as He gets the chance to? Uh, what?

There has to come a time where its just you and God and no one else can see you through the stuff you put yourself in. No one else will understand it. No one else will seem to care. God is calling you to Him. The relationship needs to be stronger. He would like for you to spend more time with Him. You need to. You are called to do something great and in order for that to happen, you need to spend that time with greatness. There is no one else greater. No one else. Realize that!

Now look at the title of this entry. You were drawn to the title because it sounds like you. But in reading the contents, you think that could be the voice of God protecting His own. You were right the first time. God would never call you His kid. As much as I have heard and said myself, I am a King's kid, it was wrong and God saw no pleasure in us saying such things. Let's break this down biblicily.

There will come a time (if it hasn't already begun) where God will begin to separate the goats from the sheep.

It is depicted in the parable of the wheat and the tares. The servant tells the farmer that the devil has planted some tares among the wheat. Problem is that the tares look like the wheat and it takes an experienced farmer to know the difference. God's wisdom and infinite mercy shows us Himself where the farmer tells the servant to allow the tares to grow. This will show which is which. Tares don't produce fruit. Tares will be pulled up, bundled together and burned. This is also illustrated when Jesus came upon a fig tree and saw no productivity on it. The tree was cursed to the root. The disciples marveled at how fast this happened.

We call our children kids not thinking that we are essentially marking them. God doesn't see your children as kids. He sees them as seeds of righteousness. Lambs, not goats. Baby goats are called kids. You do not wish to separate them yourself when God has no intention of doing this. You are creating your own chaos. You see that now, don't you? Let the Words of your mouth and meditation of your heart be acceptable in His sight. He's listening to you.  

Sabotage

The sacrifice we do for others is in hopes that the others will make better choices to be placed on a better path with less obstacles is something most Christians gladly do. We know this is pleasing unto God. We automatically make those sorts of sacrifices for our children and possibly for some of our family members. Yet, with what we know in Christ, are volunteers and philanthropic characteristics on the rise (Proverbs 21:3 AMP)? Would we still be so kind to sacrifice our time to assist in helping a stranger to understand Christianity and then follow up with where he/she attends services or the very least, pray for their spiritual growth? Do you wake up extra early to make that sacrifice in prayer for someone else (Proverbs 15:8 AMP) ? If not, are you sabotaging your own spiritual growth and success?

An attractive woman, recently divorced and raising her 4 children, establishing a home of her own and a career, she had been approached several times by men interested in dating her. Instead of having to continually reject their advances, she decided to make herself less attractive by wearing a silver wig, large framed glasses, no make up, and homely clothes. She barely looked like herself but the interest that she was receiving from so many men, stopped. She continued to obtain her education and advanced in her career. In reading this, one might think that this woman did nothing to impede her own progress. She got what she desired. Didn't she? Was it God's will? Her children grew and had independent lives while this once attractive woman who practiced being unattractive sits alone. She wishes to date now, but she isn't the same woman. God fashioned a woman to present to Adam (Genesis 2:21-23 NASB). There were specifics that God put in her for Adam and no one else. How this woman looked and behaved was a deliberate training. If her first husband could not see those attributes - oh well, he missed out. She was meant for someone else, but how will she know this now? It is so important to acknowledge God before making even the smallest of changes (Proverbs 3:6 KJV).

Would anyone make a conscious decision in destroying all of the good created? You would think not, yet doesn't it happen all of the time? Why would anyone take drugs with all of the information there is not to? Why does a grown woman have multiple sex partners when she has children fathered by several different men? Why does a thief run from the police then cries for mercy when the judge finds that he is a habitual offender? Why have children that you don't wish to raise? Why speak poorly of your child's mother/father (Proverbs 14;1 AMP)?

Sinners, well, that's their choice to be blind (Ephesians 4:17-32 KJV). For a Christian its insane to work against progress. In counseling, some women allow for me to gain some insight about their faith in God. When they do, the counseling strategy changes. A particular woman professing Jesus as her Lord and Savior has one child and her recreational activity is smoking dope while her child is in the car with her. One of my tasks for her was to find housing. When I did, management requires for this type of housing that the residents are drug free. A urine test is given on the spot. As I was filling the paper work, the test came back positive. The administrator reported that the positive reading was a hard positive; meaning, that the client had a few hits just before taking the test. No matter how many sessions and trials to gain free housing - the results were the same. How? Why? She manages to pass the drug test to gain employment; nevertheless, she consequently sabotaged her own success in the program and had to be excused.

This isn't exclusive to women. Men have their dirt to clean as well. A man is in a hurry to marry. When  he does, he expects his wife to be the woman his mother never was to his father. She cooked and cleaned for her new husband. One would think he would be pleased with her efforts. Instead, he would spill a drop of red soda on the floor daily just to see if she would clean it. Day after day. Month after month. Year after year until she couldn't take it (Proverbs 21:19 AMP). His actions served as fodder for arguments until the new couple sounded just like his parents (Proverbs 17:1 AMP). Oddly, he was content. She eventually left him. His parents divorced at the same amount of years married as well.

Yeah, you can blame the enemy and to some degree that would be true; yet, if you know better, why not do better? Why not practice what the Word says so the enemy is never allowed a strong hold (Luke 11;21-26 AMP)? Is that too much trouble to do too?

What Is A Wife?

A question seemingly to be obvious but the truth of the matter is, most women enter the institution of marriage with a blind fold on hoping to feel for the target as she goes along (Psalm 119:105 KJV). In the past few decades, however, women might think that which is apparent, we have been missing it. Well, that's what divorce is. It is apparent to one what to do and the other is not in agreement. The lack of agreement over a given period of time is failure to maintain the one-ness that marriage is; which is the definition of divorce. It takes two to be married - so, it can't be the fault of one without the other. Right?

Coming to this conclusion, too many women have agreed to do some things different after processing other failed relationships in their minds. However, they don't realize that it sells themselves short of the treasure that women really are. Some women have agreed in many circumstances just to live together without some superficial paper stating what the two (the man and woman) have claimed to be in their own minds - married. This way, if it doesn't work out, each can go their separate ways without all of the red tape, lawyers and money involved (Galatians 6:7 AMP). Both have learned a lesson and the next time won't make those same mistakes. It works out perfectly and no one gets hurt. Right?

Here's the funny thing though, if it is just a superficial piece of paper why does it mean so much when the process begins? When celebrities that have lived together for years in harmony (supposedly) and then get married, why does that superficial piece of paper the reason for the demise of their union? Why is it that the difference between making those vows (promises) to do what the minister, clergy, or officiant, tells the two to repeat causes some to stutter, cry, or even pause at what is being said. If its so superficial, why get cold feet after all of the money has been spent, invitations have been sent, and the tailoring of all of the clothes have been done? Its the same person that you have been dating in front of the same people invited to come and celebrate with you just to get a simple supposedly superficial piece of paper (1 Corinthians 7:1-5 AMP). Right?

Yet, in all of that process of trying to figure what is and isn't superficial or what is good in the sight of God, no one has taken the time to find out what would be good for the two individuals getting hitched for the rest of their lives. No one has taken the time to see if that can be done and will it affect the Kingdom Life that was sought after all while the two were single. In some ministries, there is marital counseling and thank God for the insight there; nevertheless, before the two become one, there should be counseling individually for each to understand what is expected of the other.

We hope that the two are mature enough to figure this out for themselves, yet the truth of the matter can be read in black and white as the divorce rate is anything but zero. The answer is not for the two to live together in secret and hope that it will all work out, God is not mocked. The answer is not for the two to live with the parents of the other so the parents can figure it out for the son; and then, if that doesn't work, the parents can send her on her way but the son is saved and she will have to pick up the pieces with her own family. Gee, how loving!

When the two receive counseling individually, then let the next session be together as they come to realize some things. Did she wish to work outside of the home? Did she wish to have children? How many, if she does? Did she realize that she is supposed to be the help to her husband? What does this help mean to her?Did she know that he will be the head of her (Ephesians 5:23 KJV)? Did she know that she is to reverence him (1 Peter 3:2 AMP)? Does she know what reverence means? Does she know that he is to love her as Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5:25 KJV)? Does she know what that means? Does she know that she is to be submissive to her husband (Ephesians 5:22 AMP)? Does she know that the verse above that one is that they are suppose to submit to each other (Ephesians 5:21 AMP)? Does she know that arguing isn't healthy in a marriage or any relationship (James 1:20 AMP)? These are the things that are baffling to many people, even those not seeking to be married. These are things that are necessary to be known to have Kingdom Living (Romans 14:17 KJV). Without Kingdom Living in place, marriage will not be the catalyst that will give it to the individual or the couple.

To answer the question, what is a wife, one would have to find out what Jesus expected from the church then make it applicable to the individual. This can be different to each of us because we are assigned different tasks in the body of Christ. Be as it may, she has to know what it is that God has spoken in her heart to do. This way when the right man comes and asks for her hand, he is going to treat her as it is written. She will recognize the greater one on the inside of him because He is the same on the inside of her. They are equal and joy, peace and righteousness can continue and are all the more stronger for it. Selah.

The Secret Stash

Its a little sumptin'-sumptin' just for you. Its not hurting anyone, you get some sort of pleasure by having it, and its not hindering your Christianity in anyway - right? Is God pleased with this stash of yours?

What's God have to do with it?

Interesting question, from a believer with an attitude thinking that this little stash is going to be something that God will have you give up. Maybe not. Let's see what that secret stash couldn't possibly be first.
You know it could not be:
- drugs
- alcohol
- prescription drugs (not prescribed to you)
- pornography
- extra-marital affair(s)
- old love letters
- old journals
- little black phone book (if married)
- pictures of broken relationships
- mementos given by past relationships

Some of these things are pretty obvious as to why a born again believer shouldn't have. If there is an issue giving one of the first 5 things up, seek personal counseling. The first 5 things will compromise your faith in God. The last 5 are more of a compromise with peace in your home, especially if you are married. People are peculiar. While one is secure with who they are and have no problems with his/her spouse's past, the other person is trying not to be jealous. In a couple of years the outcome of both of those people will be volatile or headed for divorce court. Why? People change.

Actually, it makes no sense to me as to why anyone would need to have this secret stash especially if he/she is calling themselves a well seasoned Christian trusting in God. In order for you to have a secret stash of anything is direct proof that you don't trust in Him.

A family member got married last year and during the wedding ceremony there were a few people in the bridal party that brought some booze. Why would anyone do this at a Christian wedding? It's disrespectful and undermining the foundation by which the couple was married. I watched as they tried to get the groom to consume the alcohol convincing him that it is a time of celebration and if he weren't going to cut loose now -then when? When, indeed. Later my sons asked what was the big deal? They went as far as asking me where does it say in the bible that it is a sin to drink alcohol. I got the distinct feeling that my innocent children were curious about what everyone else was having fun with and they have denied themselves for so long and for what reason. Understand, they have all been raised in church, I had to tread lightly in explaining why. They, unlike myself at their age, understand the Word. My son stated directly, "if you can show me in the Word, I won't ever drink." I was put on the spot. Something I didn't expect from them, but I understood where they were coming from having faced the same temptation (Proverbs 20:1 KJV, Isaiah 5:11-17 AMP, Isaiah 28:7 KJV, Luke 1:15 KJV, Ephesians 5:18 AMP).

A man with a young family had finally established his home. His wife had three children for him. Two daughters and a son. He was content with what he had and knew that it could only get better. Every Sunday, he would relax and it was the custom for him to go to the corner store with his son and purchase the Sunday news, a comic book for his son, and a magazine for his wife. Unless his daughters asked for something specific, it wasn't a big deal for them. It was only on the second week of the month would the routine change. He'd still purchase the paper, the comic book, and the magazine, but there was an added little pleasure that he would have for himself. It was the time for the new girlie mags of the month. Along with everything else, he would take his little secret pleasure mag and roll it up in the newspaper. For some reason, he thought he had hid it from his family and the only one that knew about it and didn't seem to mind was his wife. She saw it, but said nothing. After so many years, the marriage didn't work and the family was split apart with the man moving into his own place. As his only son grew to be a young man himself, he started his own collection of nude magazines. Where did he get this habit from? The children grew and moved out, getting married and having children of their own. One of the marriages from that family didn't work out. It was one of the daughters. She caught her husband cheating several times and didn't know what to do to salvage the marriage. She and her children moved back home with her mother. The daughter remembered what her brother use to collect and made sure to check the room that her sons would be sleeping in. It seemed to be cleared of any of the nude magazines. They unpacked and got settled into their new residence. As the boys moved about discovering all the different places they could play and hide, one of the sons found a picture torn from one of those magazines. She was posed provocatively with a man. The son that found the  picture was 7. He told no one of his new found secret stash.

I haven't quite got a grip in understanding why a married Christian man would need to have pornography magazines as well. It just doesn't make sense to me. He has a wife! If he loves his wife as Christ loved the church and gave his life up for her, then why would he have porn too. What does this porn make his wife feel like? Isn't she enough? If it is all for fun and no big deal, why not give it up? If it is no big deal, why didn't you tell her about your porn stash when you were dating? If it is no big deal, let your pastor know that you have it and hear if he thinks its no big deal in front of your wife. Seriously, if you have to hide it, its a big deal and what's worse - you knew it all along!

 Before Ted Bundy was executed for being a serial rapist, he confessed. He said that his ways stemmed from pornography. He made this confessions after he knew he couldn't get away with it anymore. His arrogance became bigger then himself when he decided to be his own defense - yet with as much wrong as he was facing, it was obvious where he was going to end up. He failed and just before he was about to leave this earth, scripture stood to do what it does. A verse or two came to mind at his confession - pride goes before a fall (Proverbs 16:18 KJV). How can that happen unless entertained and given place (Ephesians 4:27 KJV).

That list above is what some people use as a vice. It temporarily allows the user to escape from the journey chosen. The problem with that list, anyone of those things used on a continuum, will have that user more in lack then he ever thought he could be in - for it is written (Proverbs 24:30-34 KJV).

Calmly Think On This (Selah)

I was reading a book entitled, Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage in the Bible by Jay E. Adams. It is one of the few books that I even bothered to read the preface and introduction (I usually like getting into the meat of the Word, nevertheless...) before really diving into it. Not usually reading Christian authors that weren't referred to me by a reputable Christian themselves (Matthew 7:16 KJV), I was surprised that some of the questions he remarks about, even before I could finish the first chapter, I have had; which is the reason for this blog entry.

The topic of his book is where I believe God called me to (along with the family, of course) and I am in agreement with the author that there just isn't enough information to help believers who seem to be falling in slots of the world with the excuse that God doesn't mention these matters in the Word and therefore neither do men and women of God. That would be error.

The other focus the author mentions is the differences between conservative and liberal Christians. Terms I would only use with politicians but until he described his definitions of each, I had to do a selah myself. The liberals bend the biblical principles to fit everyone in and the conservatives border on tradition and religion rather then faith, research for the truth, and prayer. Which are you?

Its just with all of the reading, it made me think of something that I don't believe has really been an issue. I  don't mean for it to be an issue now, its just that I would think that pastors would be more on their guard not to marry people so quickly just because the two individuals say that they are ready when we all know who has ever been there, they don't have a clue. Let's calmly think about this, seeing it is one of the elements that makes the foundation for the next generation.

Understanding that the two young people determined to marry have no idea what the life they are choosing will come to, who then is at fault when the two end up in divorce. Resoundingly, most people will say that it is the fault of the two individuals that decided to marry, yet we have already established that they have no idea what they are getting themselves into. So therefore, we could then use the verse, my people perish for lack of knowledge, and be done with it (Hosea 4:6 KJV). Oh well, it was their choice. But what about the verses that if you know to do good and not do it, to him it is a sin (James 4:17 KJV)? Or the one about, the older training the younger (Titus 2:1-4 AMP)? What about the one where the Word tells that if you saw that something bad was going to happen and did nothing to stop it and bad happened, that the blood is on your hands (Ezekiel 33:1-11 AMP)? With that established, let's look at these young people stepping into a territory that they know nothing about.

Not doing things as the world does them, wouldn't it be beneficial for all of the denominations to come together and be in agreement - at least those that believe Jesus is Lord and are only looking to please the Father, to not marry anyone without them agreeing to 4 weeks of marital counseling. I don't mean meeting one day a week... I mean 4 weeks. That's 30 days! 30 days of the pastor (or qualified Christian counselor) seeing the behavior of the two people each time they come in to meet, the attitude of the two people when asked those tough questions, the answers given of the two when topics that weren't discussed in the dating process comes up, talking about finances, sex, their history of sex, children, family, values, ethics, morals, fidelity, taxes, etc. No stone left unturned. If not this way, then what?

I pose the question to all who believe that Jesus is Lord. There will come a day when we are all going to be judged (James 5:9-10 AMP). Believers who have divorced and have remarried will be judged as whore mongers and adulterers, for it is written (Hebrews 13:4 KJV). There is no getting around that. But if the two that married didn't know this and the one that married them did - who is it again that will be judged? I have been to Christian counseling sessions and I believed many times that the counselor would have this enormous insight about the issue I was having. I believed this not only because of the expertise but also because of the anointing that is on this professional individual. I cannot describe to you the disappointment when leaving the session no more enlightened then I was going in. Would that be my fault that there was no breakthrough? The counselor would have you believe that it is. What would Jesus say?

There are pastors, ministers, evangelists, and all sorts of clergy that marry people to enhance and build their congregation. On the outside it looks well and we move on to matters of more concern. But if we really looked at the heart of this man/woman of God in doing such a thing it is the equivalence of giving the keys to a drunk to drive himself safely home with the instruction, "be careful." You can see that he cannot be careful! He is not equipped to! How can we keep doing this?!!